When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~ Viktor Frankl
How do you respond when a plan goes off script?
Your flight to an important destination gets delayed. Do you immediately swing into action by arguing with airline employees, desperately trying to ‘stick to the plan’ no matter what tries to derail it? Or, do you get curious about what options or opportunities might result from the unexpected detour and go exploring the airport while you wait?
Clinging to Control
Control is the default tool often used to fix what is wrong, fight against change and resist ‘what is’. It is a narrowly focused, unconscious reaction that rigidly refuses to accept any outcome other than the chosen one. It causes you to micro-manage everything around you in order to force a result and it can leave you feeling anxious, exhausted, powerless and entirely blind to the limitless possibilities and new opportunities in your orbit.
The Meaning of Surrender
Surrender can bring up all kinds of negativity and resistance. You may think it means failure, giving up, showing weakness, or allowing yourself to be dominated by someone or something else.
However, surrendering acknowledges a deep desire to transcend struggle and transform negative emotions. It grants you permission to access your true, trusting and wise nature so that you can move effortlessly in alignment with the perfect order of the universe.
In your wandering through the airport, you may meet a significant person or discover a book that transforms you. Without surrender, you are left at the gate anxiously engaged in a futile argument.
Surrender faces the reality of the moment and acknowledges that, even though it might not be ‘the plan’, it is the present truth and it requires your attention and respect as well as your acceptance and curiosity.
Breathwork and Surrender
In a Breathwork session, resistance to the process can manifest physically as tetany (tightness and cramping of hands, arms etc). The unconscious belief might be, ‘if I hold back, I can force an opposite outcome and avoid what I don’t want to experience.’ Surrendering fully to the process allows the breath to do its work of releasing cellular memories that are blocking your full joy and profound acceptance of your personal truth.
Surrender is the ultimate sign of strength and the foundation for a spiritual life. ~ Debbie Ford
The Essence of Surrender
A life of surrender is intimately interwoven with trust that your personal input is not needed for everything to be well. It is the polar opposite of resistance that asks you to stop fighting with yourself, your circumstances, others and the universe. It means that you cease your endless resistance to the natural flow of things. It asks that you stop pushing against the reality of ‘now’.
The quality of being surrendered acknowledges that:
- an unseen intelligent force and guidance is present all the time even if you are unaware of it
- new, unknown directions can be embraced and you can still be okay if you don’t maintain full control
- there is a distinct heart sense of being pulled in a direction rather than being pushed or forced.
- taking action feels effortless and consciously in flow with the moment. You feel more aware and awake then you ever have.
Questions to Support Letting Go:
- What is my fear if I let go of control?
- What does life look and feel like if I flow with ‘what is’?
- What does self-trust and trust in the universe look and feel like to me?
- What do I need to understand/know about my inner strength and capability so I can support myself to let go?
- When was change a positive experience in life?
Surrender can transform life. It can release anxiety and allow things to happen in the natural way they were intended. It opens you up to more creativity, personal empowerment, greater strength, resilience and self-mastery.
Open up to the magic and colour of surrender and observe where it leads!